Posted Nov-03-2017 12:28 PM
4. Land of the Lost
This movie is campy beyond belief. The jokes don't land, a T.rex is reduced to a pet, and defies physics. The characters aren't interesting, and sadly, Will Ferrell is one of the weakest points.
3. Jurassic World
F*cking hate this goddamn movie. It's a bland, boring, watered-down carbon copy of the original film, which it doesn't deserve to be compared to. The characters are dislikable, especially the kids, and don't even get me started on the villain. Militarised dinosaurs was such a moronic idea, and the only enjoyable part of the movie is the final fight. It's also really, really, overrated.
2. Jurassic Park III
I hate this film because of a) how bad it was, and b) the impact it left. The characters are dislikable idiots *looks at Amanda Kirby*, the plot is lackluster, and it doesn't have the same sense of wonder that the first two movies maintained. And then, there's its impact. The fight between the T.rex and the Spinosaurus divided the dinosaur fanbase, and is the reason the cancerous, b!tch-ass, horrifying, despicable, stupid, Spinosaurus boss joined YouTube to spread AIDS. It really shows how they dropped the balls with this one. At least the director, Joe Johnston, would redeem himself with 2011's Captain America: The First Avenger, although Joe and Anthony Russo would outdo that film with Winter Soldier and Civil War.
1. "Walking With Dinosaurs"
Walking With Dinosaurs, or as I like to call it, Cancer: The Movie, is by far the worst dinosaur movie I've ever seen. Ever. The jokes are childish and not funny (poop jokes, really?), the characters are annoying, and the plot is damn well cliched. And sadly, it was named after one of the greatest documentaries of all time, which means that this disgusting atrocity of a product is forever linked to a masterpiece of my childhood. F*ck this movie, f*ck it.
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